Our family–my parents’ family–held its first family meeting, a governance meeting, last Saturday. Neither our mother (who died in 1985) nor our father (still living) participated. Indeed, the meeting came about specifically to discuss what we, his children, should do with, for, and about our father.

There were a number of obstacles we had to overcome before we could hold our meeting. For one: who would be in charge? Who should lead? Brother #1 is in Germany. Brother #2 (that’s me!) wasn’t pushing for a meeting. So it was initiated by Brother #3.

Most significant, however: the six of us live all over the world. Three of us live in Colorado (about 45 miles from one another); one of us is in Orlando, Florida; and two are in Germany–one in Hamburg and one in Mainburg–over 350 miles away from one another.

So we held a “virtual” meeting via telephone (or Skype) on FreeConferenceCall.com.

It was Brother #3 who suggested the technology. Brother #4 (the youngest of the six of us) asked for a specific agenda. Brother #3 provided some suggestions for things he thought we needed to discuss:

• Ensure everyone’s understanding what has been happening.
• Discuss where we are, individually, in the transition from attempting to “fix” Dad’s issues to “accepting” his habits, etc.
• Are we okay with Dad *NOT* getting medical help for possible condition(s)? [Whether we are or we are not: can we do anything about it if he doesn't want help?]
• Supporting Dad and his wife at this time.
• Possibly praying about what’s going on.

All things considered, I’d say the meeting was a success.

Brother #3 served admirably as chairperson. I piped up as I believed necessary. Others chimed in upon occasion.

We covered the “agenda” items.

By the end of the meeting, there was a strong sense of solidarity. And, most importantly, we all agreed on a course of action that will involve several of us, including family members in Germany and the United States–some of whom would not have been involved if we hadn’t held the meeting.

These are all good outcomes.

The family is certainly not (yet?) of a mind to establish any kind of long-term governance structure. But it was good to know that the six of us can conduct ourselves, if and as we think it is necessary, as a kind of family government.

Nice, too, to get this first experience under belts when we are not completely in crisis mode!

And, finally, I’d like to note how wonderful it is that we have the kinds of communication tools that are available to us today.

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