I thought this was a nice way to summarize a lot of the issues you should think about before talking with an attorney or other legacy planning professional about your legacy plan: Read the rest of this entry »

I’ve written already about some tools to help you tell your story (or stories).

I thought I’d share a bit about how I’m doing with my own story-telling . . . and what I’m doing, specifically, to make my story-telling simply happen.

(It’s not easy! You definitely have to decide you’re going to take the bull by the horns and make him move in the direction you want him to.)

But I think it’s worthwhile. Read the rest of this entry »

A homeschooling acquaintance of mine who goes by the online moniker “Prairie Chick” posted a story that inspired me about how to pass on and reinforce family values even among elementary school-age children (let alone older children and adults).

I saw her story on the Sonlight forums. When I asked her permission to share it here, she noted that she had also posted it on one of her blogs, The Prairie Schoolhouse. Read the rest of this entry »

In my last post, I talked about giving your children the vast majority of their inheritance “early”–while they’re still in their 20s and early 30s, say–rather than later.

A few weeks ago, I was talking with a friend who has many years’ experience counseling and coaching wealthy individuals . . . as a wealthy person himself and a friend, not as a professional counselor. He made an interesting observation about a reason why you want to predefine for your heirs–and make sure they know–how much you intend to leave them: You want to remove every potential reason they may have (every potential conflict-of-interest) that may lead them to think that, by reducing cost of the care you receive toward the end of your life, they will benefit.

“I have seen it,” he said, “where the children say, ‘Y’know, if we put Mom in the _____ Village, we will be spending [i.e., they will be digging into Mom's nest-egg!] to the tune of an extra $50,000 a year compared to _____ Nursing Home. Why should we waste our money?’ “

Of course, they are not “wasting” money if the quality of service is significantly different (which it was in this particular case). And they weren’t about to “waste” or “spend” their money. It was Mom‘s money they were talking about. But they were already anticipating it as their own. And so they withheld from their mother what should have been rightfully hers . . . if only she and her husband had done advanced planning that predefined for the children exactly what they could expect and demonstrated that there was no reason for the kids to modify their care plans in hopes of gaining advantages for themselves.

Is your house big enough? Do you need more room? Will your family be happier in a bigger home?

I think my perspective on this issue was shaped a bit last week by a conversation I had with a few members of an American family that has lived and worked most of the time over the last nine years in the foothills of the Himalayas. Read the rest of this entry »

Isaiah 38 and 39 in the Bible describes a period in the life of one of the kings of Israel when he had an infection that placed him on death’s doorstep. Hezekiah prayed, “Oh, YHWH¹, remember how I have walked before you in faithfulness and with a whole heart, and have done what is good in your sight.”

Then the word of [YHWH] came to Isaiah: “Go and say to Hezekiah, Thus says [YHWH], the God of David your father: I have heard your prayer; I have seen your tears. Behold, I will add fifteen years to your life.” (Isaiah 38:4-5 ESV)

Cool! Hezekiah was thrilled.

Next thing we read (chapter 39): Merodach-baladan the son of Baladan, king of Babylon, sent envoys with letters and a present to Hezekiah. Read the rest of this entry »

Find it difficult to be involved with your family? The first step to achieve balance in this area may be to value the goal. Read the rest of this entry »

How can you maximize the time your family spends together and maximize the transfer of values from one generation to another?

I got thinking about this when my sister mentioned that her family was bringing her in-laws (both in their 90s, and not necessarily the easiest people to get along with!) into their home for several weeks. How could that time be made as pleasant and profitable as possible?

One of the things we do in our family–even now, after the kids are grown and three of the four are married, and we have five grandkids: We read out loud together. We don’t watch TV. Every once in a while we will watch a movie. But for maximum mutual engagement, besides just plain talking with one another, we will read a book together out loud.

Sarita always suggests three or four books we might read when we’re headed off for vacation. The rest of us, then, together, make the final selection.

[I should note: Sarita has an uncanny ability to choose "the best of the best" when it comes to books. But, then, I guess, she ought to! After all, she reads over a dozen books a week, and she has been doing that for some 40 years or more.]

The books themselves, of course, offer tremendous value on their own. But they also offer another value: they inspire us to interact. We always seem to want to talk about what we’re reading.

Let me illustrate. Read the rest of this entry »